choice.

wow. It's been a long while since I spent any time on this little blog. I stated quite clearly in my last post that I'd be stopping by sporadically, so I guess in my dictionary "sporadic" means: every 7 months.
Not much has happened since April, you know, just finished moving into the house, had a baby, enjoyed maternity leave (but was highly disappointed that Bethenny's talk show was not aired in San Diego), watched a lot of Olympics (I never really got to watch weightlifting though, and that's one of my fav events. oh well... in 4 years), went back to work and all the while have been falling madly in love with my little nugget Colt. And then yesterday a new president was elected. And today is my husband's birthday. So, you see - not much at all.

I'm not really sure why I decided to start writing again today. I think maybe it's because I've been feeling a little out of control. And control is one of those things I like to have a firm grasp on.
I've been struggling the last week or so with some personal and family issues, so that's left me a little down (ok, a lot. it's stuff I obsess over. but just a little bit).
Colton, who was an AMAZING sleeper as a wee babe has decided that sleeping longer than 3 to 4 hours is no longer en vogue and is making our nights a little hellish. This has led me to try to read up on "sleep schedules" and "sleep training" and wowza, it's basically rocket science. But harder.
And then enter: election day and election night and the day after and the week after and the 4 years after and, and, and.... It makes me feel like I'm drowning. There is negativity everywhere I look. Negativity even in the celebrations because people always feel the need to put someone else down in order to feel lifted up. It's depressing. And trust me - I don't need help feeling negative or depressed. I've mastered those two things quite well all on my own.

Today I had a make a choice. A choice to rise above all those things. A choice to put myself in control. As much as I'd like to, there are many, many things I can't control. I can't control others and their actions. I apparently can't control how well my baby sleeps (even though supposedly I should be able to). I can't control who the rest of the country chooses to be the President. But I am in control of myself and my choices. And today I choose to celebrate.
I choose to celebrate my amazing husband and the day of his birth and how hard he works and how much he does for our family. I celebrate the fact that the cutest little man in all the land is sitting on my lap right now and I get to spend all day, every day with this smiling, babbling, bundle of pure joy. And I celebrate the fact that I believe in a God who is in control of all the other things I can't, so I never really have to worry.

You have a choice to make today too - What will it be?